THE PARADE THAT WASN’T

 

In Anne Lamott’s Bird by Bird (an alternate sort of Bible for writers) there is a poignant chapter on the bloated expectations authors have for “Publication Day.” [See page 208, “Publication”]

 

Publication day is a date set by traditional publishers, after which the book will be available in stores or for order online. It’s the TAH-DAH!!! Day and your book’s birthday and let’s have a party day, drum-roll, ready-set-go-- horns blowing and pop out of a cake: your book is out in the world. 🎆

 

As Ms. Lamott tells it, it is nothing of the above.  99.9% of published writers know she’s spot on.

 

On any given year, all the parades and woopteedoo are for ten or twenty titles in the whole country. These are from the uber commercially successful authors or debuts that somehow hit the nerve-de-jour, usually for political reasons. Fine fiction writers should know that publication day is meaningful to one person only, themselves.

 

You can give your book a launching party, and it will be attended mostly by supportive friends. You can do a blog tour exchanging favors with other author friends, and their readers will note your book was born. It’s fine, because it means something to you.

 

But no parade. Nope, not even a small one. The hard work of letting people you never met become aware your story is available has just. barely. begun.

 

A good glimpse into the realistic experience of almost all authors and what we can, in fact, do on publication day— is in this post.

 

I’d add that doing a private dance in front of the mirror is highly recommended, also.

🎈🎈🎈

APRIL 9TH IN HISTORY

 

Lee Surrenders

“It would be useless and therefore cruel,” Robert E. Lee remarked on the morning of April 9, 1865, “to provoke the further effusion of blood, and I have arranged to meet with General Grant with a view to surrender.”

 

The two generals met shortly after noon on April 9, 1865, at the home of Wilmer McLean in the village of Appomattox Court House, Virginia. Lee’s surrender of the Army of Northern Virginia to Ulysses S. Grant, general-in-chief of all United States forces, hastened the conclusion of the Civil War.

 

Regardless of which side of history you side with in any specific conflict, it is something to celebrate when men of war call it quits in order to save lives.

 

I’m commemorating April the 9^th today, with the hope that all who rejoice in raising arms will consider how much greater the alternative is.

SHARING FIVE TAKEAWAYS from a Webinar

 

A few months have passed since I attended a so-called “closed” webinar with a senior editor in one of the big-five publishing houses, and so I feel no shame in sharing the main takeaways for all who are knocking on publishers’ doors.

 

This sort of insider’s view should not be a secret. There are many misconceptions floating on the interwebs, and writers (who the editor remined us— are the bedrock of publishing) have it hard enough already.

 

Takeaway #1

For the big-five and their imprints, you need an agent. We knew this, but it was emphasized as in no real exceptions, period. Forget about special openings or contests.

This ties to the last takeaway, but bear with me.

 

Takeaway #2

For debut fiction*, whether kidlit or adult, your web-presence is not a consideration for acquisitions. Someone asked about the number of Facebook friends and the editor said that “Facebook isn’t a thing anymore.” Nor are any of the other digital town squares. Just make sure you haven’t made hordes of zany cuckoo comments, which if you’re agented is likely not an issue. (Agents weed for this before taking writers on.)

*Non-fiction is a different story

 

Takeaway #3

Yes, it is harder now to get traditionally published. It was never easy and it’s been hard forever. But since the pandemic closures it’s harder, as in much harder. If you had the fortitude to plow forward before, you must double down now. It’s the same trek only steeper.

 

Takeaway #4

The theme, plot, pace--- all must quicken the reading editor’s heart. But none of those matter as much as the quality of the prose. If the writing voice doesn’t “pop,” the big-five editor just moves on to the next submission to be rejected.

 

Takeaway #5

Who your agent is matters a whole lot. Editors remember agents who have sent them “yawners” and “un-sparkling” submissions before. They remember agents they didn’t like dealing with. Worse, they are aware of the bestselling writers the agent also represents or if they don’t have any A-list writers as clients. There is a definite hierarchy in consideration of submissions depending on the agent’s standing.

 

This last takeaway may be the hardest insider’s view to hear.  

 

All that said, I will focus on the only thing in my control: write better.

A CURIOUS ANIMAL CALLED “AUTOFICTION”

 

Some months ago, a post about Autofiction popped into my feed. Here it is, for reference.

 

Succinctly defined, it’s an autobiographical story that is then fictionalized. In many ways all fiction draws from the writer’s life, but in autofiction the connection is much tighter. Call it fictionalized autobiography.

 

(As an aside, much in published autobiographies is also fictionalized, as the author attempts to justify, obfuscate, and shape their past reality— whether as an act to deceive or an act of self-deception.)

 

In other words, the lines are blurry at best. Maybe this is why I was unfamiliar with the notion of “autofiction.”

 

My published novel, The Voice of Thunder, was called by one reviewer “fictionalized autobiography.” Fair enough. It began as a short non-fiction memoire and morphed way off course into fiction. All my work draws from my life, even talking animal stories.

 

But just a couple of years ago I had the true experience of writing autofiction.

 

An injurious event I had lived, while deep into the Covid pandemic when the world had shut down and many suffered more real existential hardships, was the inexplicable and abrupt end of a seventeen-year friendship. My former friend just informed me she never wanted to hear from me again, no further explanation.

 

If you’ve had this happen to you, you know how injurious this is. But it was a first for me and I was ill prepared. In a time where social contacts were already strained by governments everywhere, this was especially hurtful.

 

I had a lot of time to mull over how I had gotten myself into this predicament, and how my judgment regarding this friendship had been so off mark. I was eager to take responsibility in every way I could, because I have power only over what is up to me.

 

Still under various degrees of quarantine, I had the time and the impetus to try and solve this mystery by--- yup, writing a fictional story about a friendship that turned out to be an illusion. Or was it a delusion? That was but one of the many questions.

 

The writing itself would reveal and also serve to heal.

 

After many revisions, I’ve started querying this story, which turned out to be much more fictional on the surface, as they all do. It’s a good story and its setting befits the world I write about, that of much younger readers in middle school.

 

But the theme still holds strong. Who is a friend? How do you know a friendship is true? What do we make of friends who behave like frenemies?  

 

So, before I knew the term autofiction, I wrote it. Now I also have the writerly word for it.

CAT INDULGENCES

 

Once again, I’m allowing myself a post that celebrates my cats, with your indulgence. It helps that the goofy celebration of Purim is around the corner. 🎉

 

A few years ago, a friend who is not a feline fancier, asked me if having my cats makes moments of defeat better tolerated.

 

I remember my answer, which stands to this day. “They make EVERYTHING better.” 😻

{All right. Maybe first-drafting, with their playful paws trying to catch my typing fingers, is the exception}

 

So, I owe them. 😼😺😻

 

The curly font (sorry if it’s not fun to read) reflects their sensibilities. They insisted I use it here.

🐱🐱🐱

The THEME

 

I know I’ve posted on this before, though it’s been a while.

Good stories have an underlying theme, or themes.

We know the how-to advice, that strong stories are better born of strong characters, and the more generic/commercial stories are born of a plot arc.

 

For me, almost all stories are incepted from themes, and as I draft, I keep the theme front of mind.

 

Pivotal themes in picture books are family, the nature of nature and other man-made creations, feelings such as sadness or joy, and concepts such as numbers/colors/letters.

For middle grade readers (ages 8-12) central themes are friendship, family, school struggles and, as the perennial for all ages, the nature of our world, i.e., reality and our place in it.

 

I got to thinking about it again as I read this post here.

 

I know what themes I want to explore. Then, I choose the persons who would go on this exploration (protagonist and antagonist) and their side characters usually emerge as the plot unfolds. Mechanics of plot are so well researched in how-to books that this is the smaller, less demanding part of drafting.

 

Most storytellers don’t follow this order of construction, but I offer it as yet another way.

CONFLICTING ADVICE

 

Re-reading this post, I thought how hard it is to know, really know, which advise to follow when one opinionator differs from the other.

 

This is a perennial problem. It’s felt keenly when the less experienced ask for guidance from the more experienced. This is a universal dilemma which we encounter in every field and every matter.

 

Gone are the days when “father knew best” and adults were authorities on every issue under the sun. Besides, having grown up and now being one of those adults, means the final judgement is ours, and we own it.

 

The world of knowledge is complex, so we turn to experts. But, oh my, the experts don’t agree. Even if “most” (by whose measure?) say one thing, who’s to say the minority isn’t more correct? It’s happened before, countless times.

 

Here’s where I stand: I ask. I listen. I let feedback and information rest for a time and settle. Then I do what feels right to me.

 

Because, like the referenced post says, it often comes down to taste and sensibilities. We have to live with ours.

Do You LOVE What You Do?

 

In every line of work there are aspects that are less likable. Some of these “unlikables” are universal, but most are not. (You’d think that cleaning toilets, for example, would be one of the universally despised tasks, but I have known more than one person who didn’t feel this way.)

 

But then there are the things people love about their job. Perhaps it’s their co-workers, or the way they can look with satisfaction at what they have done/made/accomplished at the end of the week, or the challenge of the work itself.

 

No matter what, the closest way I find to gauging how much one loves what they do is, barring the need for money, if they do or don’t wish to retire.

 

I thought about it the other day, when one of my doctors (the internist I see for general checkups who is universally adored by her patients) told me she hopes to retire soon. She isn’t old, not by MDs standards, for they have no mandatory retirement age.

My dermatologist, who is at least twenty years older than my GP, told me he can’t imagine retiring. He loves his work.

 

I thought about it again when a writing colleague who’s a gifted and published writer said she was done writing. She’s now a retired writer. It has been a rewarding and enriching journey, but she was done.

Writers, like doctors, don’t have to retire. Writing is separate from publishing, because most writers are never published. This isn’t (for the vast majority) a matter of money.

 

It is all about how much you love what you do.

 

If money considerations were not in the mix, would you:

1.      Retire right now

2.      Never retire

3.      Not sure. Not retire now but can see retiring from your work in the future

 

I am guessing (it isn’t more than a guess, no statistics worth quoting here) that most people would retire yesterday if money were not an issue.

That is plumb sad.

Count yourself lucky if, like my dermatologist, retirement holds no charm for you.

February 20th in History

 

Or—

1872: NEW YORK'S METROPOLITAN MUSEUM OF ART OPENS

 

{^The Metropolitan Museum of art circa 1903}

If you love visiting museums, I promise the Metropolitan Museum on New York city’s upper East Side will not disappoint.

 

At its founding, it was a modest thing, conceived in Paris by a small group of Americans who wished the new world to hold some of the treasures Europe had.

 

It grew to be one of the best museums in the world.

 

What I have learned about museums of such scope is to not try to visit all their parts, not even as “a focus plus a quick run through.” A quick run-through, as some do so they can attest to having seen, is exactly how not to enjoy a museum.

 

At the Met, as the locals call it, I make sure to focus on what I love and leave the rest. For me, it’s the Islamic art section, and (sometimes) the furnished period rooms. For you it may be Renaissance art, or art of the Far East, or costumes (much better at the Smithsonian, in my opinion) and even Impressionist art (stronger at the Museum of Modern art, also IMO.) Perhaps you’re intrigued by art of the ancient world (Greek vases, anyone?) or medieval iconography. No matter. The point is to go for what you like or are most eager to learn about when you are fresh and keen on both seeing and reading.

 

Two hours at a time does it for me. This is not a school assignment. This is about pleasure.

The key is to leave before fatigue sets in.

💐Happy Birthday💐 

💐dear MET💐

{^Damascus Room at the MET^}

Another Reason to Heart VALENTINE’S DAY

 

{Yes, it’s tomorrow}

 

The human heart doesn’t look much like the graphic known as “heart.” 💓

No matter, because it is one of my favorite symbols, and not just because of the added spiritual/emotional meaning.

 

There is something intriguing about the side-to-side/left-to-right symmetry against the asymmetry of the up-and-down/north-to-south. 

 

It’s this dichotomy that makes the heart symbol. Thus, it’s never boring.

 

It’s also this seeming built-in contradiction that does in effect echo the human emotion, the contradictions those of us who are fortunate to reach maturity learn to accept and even embrace.

 

Heart 💝 to you. If you’re reading this, you are my valentines.

DIGITAL SECURITY & COMMON SENSE

 

By now, I would hope we all know not to click on any link provided in a business email, even as the email convincingly purports to come from a trusted company we have dealings with, such as our bank, website host, or our government. Close the email and log onto your account to check if this email or purported activity did indeed take place and requires an action from you.

 

Goodness, the same digital hygiene practice also applies to emails from friends when they don’t include clear text identifiers that could only come from your friend. Spoofing email addresses is an old scammer's trick. 

   

So, when we access the purported sender the safe way by looking their contact information ourselves and asking if the email was legit, we also educate our friends to not be sending links only. As to businesses, this means calling your bank with the contact number you have (not in the email) and speaking to security.

 

And so, this is what I did. My attempt to educate my bank went as follows:

 

Mirka’s Bank Security Specialist (MBSS for short): “Yes, indeed, you did well NOT TO click on the link. You are right to check with me.”

Mirka: “So was this email from you?”

MBSS: “Yes, we sent it.”

Mirka: “And it said to click on a link?”

MBSS: “Yes, I see that.”

Mirka: “And you say I should never do that?”

MBSS: “Yes, that’s correct. Never do that. Access your account from your own log-in, always.”

Mirka: “So why do you continue to send such emails with links that ask for log-in?”

MBSS: “It’s a courtesy. A convenience. But never access any sensitive account from an email. You are right.”

 

I also got such emails from my webhost and got a similar confirmation from their security specialist that I did right NOT to access the link in the email.

 

This reminded me of the chapter in The Little Prince, where the drunk explains that he drinks to forget his shame and his shame is that he drinks.

This madness of trusted companies’ emails continues, as well as occasional real friends sending links with nary a word that would distinguish them from phishing scams. I always check, and I continue to use the safe practice of never ever clicking on email links until verified.

THE little MATTER OF GIVING UP

 

I have writing friends who say they are giving up.

 

They’re giving up writing new stories, querying agents, submitting to small publishers, and even giving up on interacting with other writers on chat groups.

 

They are dismayed at the state of publishing. Some have had great publishing credits in the past. Others have had a modicum of success, and a few have had no publishing credits. All have no interest or means ($$$) to self-publish & promote.

 

It’s okay to give up. It’s okay to do so and later change your mind. It’s okay no matter what.

 

But if writing new stories is enriching, all the giving up talk makes no sense to me.

 

Why would you deprive yourself of the deep pleasure and stimulation that writing has given you? If it’s to spare the disappointment of rejection, then isn’t all of life full of setbacks and disappointments? These are in fact some of the most enriching aspects of life, even as emotional pain isn’t “fun.”

There will be eternity in the grave to rest life’s challenging turns. Until then, writers— tell your stories.

THE MONEY in WRITING

 

OR

WRITERS and MONEY

By some estimates there are hundreds of thousands of Americans who write full time. Some sources claim as many as one million. This last number includes those who write articles and writers of non-fiction.

 

I know, this is vague. But it’s sobering to look at the storytellers who write fiction, whose numbers are closer to three hundred thousand. (Who makes these estimates? How reliable are they? I plead confusion. But anyway…)

 

It’s sobering to realize only about three hundred fiction writers make a living solely from writing.

 

Cut that number by ninety percent to count the fiction writers who are seriously wealthy* from writing.

*Think Stephen King or J.K. Rowling

 

I received a decent advance only once, and royalties also only once, for two separate traditionally published books. This is my total fiction writing income to date.

{I was paid --nominally to decently-- for exactly four published articles, and a few times for editing work. This falls into the non-fiction category, which undoubtedly supports many more in the writing community.}

 

Here’s the kicker: I received (and continue to receive) nourishment from writing fiction, but money isn’t part of it.

 

If you’re to go down this road, it’s sobering and important to grasp how money fits or doesn't fit in. Many writers (many more than the likes of me) pay to be published. Some wind up paying substantial sums that they never recoup. Long ago, I was clear this pay-to-publish wasn’t going to be my way. Vanity or self-publishing didn’t interest me. Specifically, for kidlit-- it's a money-pit. 🙀

 

Go into it with awareness. Dreaming is fine. Your dreams may come true. But have your eyes open wide.

 

 Make sure you love writing for its own sake. That’s the bottom line.

The WHY of Writing

 

“To write is to fight forgetting.”

Annie Ernaux, Nobel laureate in literature 2022

 

 

Much is made of the impetus to write. Annie Ernaux is primarily a memoirist, and so the quotation above seems a perfect fit for her motivation. Fiction writing appears to be more about organizing one’s thoughts, ideas, and ideals. After all, what is there to forget when it comes to tales of the imagination?

 

I maintain that fiction is about truth, our truth, and by writing our truth down, carved of words-sentences-paragraphs-chapters-novels, we writers are fighting the human propensity to forget.

 

Fiction/fantasy is the cloak. The body is our truth as we make an attempt to chisel and give shape to it so it may be incorporated into the communal memory.

 

Fiction is often, nay— usually, bolder, and thus more honest. Ernaux is exceptionally honest, but in my experience only fiction allows a complete unveiling.

 

This is my mini-attempt to record and reveal my personal driving force. As the number of my years grows, I am fighting forgetting with increasing ferocity.

A PITCH with a PITCHFORK

 

Querying and pitching one’s work is a craft in itself. Books and hundreds of websites of how-to are devoted to this craft and will greet a searcher.

The bottom line is that pitching is competitive, and a pitch must stand out.

 

An article I read got me thinking about a thornier matter. This article suggests writers must pitch themselves (as in “I am the product”) before getting into the work they are offering.

 

I have to say this rubs me wrong. Nay, very wrong, especially for fiction, where you can’t box the imagination and narrative powers by saying, “I did such and such.” However, as wrong as it is, it’s also part of the truth regarding successful pitching.

 

Most how-to query formats say to start with the hook of the book and end with the cook, i.e., the writer. The art of good hooking sentence/paragraph could fill library shelves, and I have one small shelf of such in my room.

 

That’s rational. That’s how it should work.

Apparently, this isn’t how it works much of the time.

Of course, if (as in the examples cited in the post) the writer has won a Pulitzer or was the first to land an aircraft upside-down, (the aircraft or the pilot being bottom up) this alone is a hook of sorts. It gets attention. Sentence one will lead the publishing professional to read the next and, eventually (hopefully), a request to see more. That’s what pitching is about, after all.

 

But few have such monumental statements to make about self, and most pitching would wind up sounding like the “fun facts” many writers mistake for an interesting bio. You know, “I finished a jar of jelly beans in eight minutes and won the Jelly Queen title at the state fair” sort of nothings. I wrote a post about this before.

 

So what to do?

 

If you won a Pulitzer, it’s worth considering the selling-of-you in the first paragraph. I’m less inclined to agree with this for most of us, good hardworking storytellers.

 

Story comes first.

SO, AGAIN— WHAT’S WITH THE CALENDAR?

 

Or…

🎇Happy New Year🎇

A new calendar year spells a new beginning; a new (or renewed) chance at getting it right. A renewed hope that the faux-pas of the past would be left on the side of the road, and the motors (echo-clean, what else) would propel smoothly and the world would~~~

🌈Live happily ever after🌈

We know better. But hope ignites at the very mention of the new year.

 

Here’s my wish to all: the wisdom and strength to understand and cope with what’s ahead.

Now go forth and prosper.

AFTER CHRISTMAS and BEFORE NEW YEAR'S

Harking back to days when I gifted and was gifted holiday gifts, (now a minor part of my holiday season) I remember the day after Christmas as the day the stores were crowded with folks returning gifts.

 

It’s a strange phenomenon, this “thanks for the thought but I’d rather have something else” that sweeps the land.

 

But it is what it is. Just try to remember that the thought that went into choosing something for you is the sweet part, not the actual “something.”

 

And let’s have fun before we take a collective breath and exhale a solemn wish for a better and more peaceful year to come.

EVOCATIVE CALENDAR DATES

 

Ever note the day’s date and feel there is something significant that you ought to have remembered about it, but you draw a blank?

 

This happens to me now and then, and usually it involves someone’s birthday who I have lost touch with long ago. Sometimes it’s a calendar date I made a point to remember for practical reasons, (time to turn the mattress, time to begin watering the yard, time to check on a relative who should have completed a last round of chemotherapy) but it was long ago.

 

Today’s date is an easy one for me: it celebrates the birth of a wonderful person I was lucky to have known. He left this earth, but his mark on it is alive and continues to bless many.

Happy Birthday, Abba

NO SECOND CHANCE~~~

 

An agent recently published a post where agent explained that she & other publishing professionals can assess a query in fifteen seconds or less.

There’s the easy “not what I work with,” the almost as easy “this reads badly,” and the less clear “not what I’m looking for right now.”

 

It sounds both arrogant and presumptuous, but it is a necessity when hundreds of queries pour in day after day.

 

I just read another post about how one’s website’s Homepage is likely the only one most visitors would glance at, and (gulp) on average, for less than a minute. That post is linked here.

 

It’s hard to think that other pages’ content you thoughtfully aggregated, mulled over, culled and refined— will remain largely unseen.

 

These are the facts. A home page is the front yard, and the way a few will choose to knock on the door and come inside.

 

My first publisher, a small house that published my picture book and had since closed, offered to make a website for me. That seemed a nice bonus. No effort to learn the ways of website hosting and design, the thought of which was intimidating. I liked their website for them, but their designer (who had designed their other authors’ sites) felt wrong for me. It was busy. It was jazzy. It was hip-hip-hoorah and kinetic to the point where one might worry about inducing seizures in susceptible individuals. 

All right, a slight exaggeration, with slight being the operative word.

 

That wasn’t going to be my calling card, which is what websites and especially their home pages serve as today.

 

So, I said, “thank you, but I’ll do my own”— and braved the choppy waters of the interwebs.

 

In addition to the good but general advice in the linked post, I would add that your home page has to feel right for you.

HERE COMES HANNUKAH…

 

…Or is it Hanuka, Hanukka, or Hannukkah?

And how about Chanukah?

 

Actually, it’s pronounced KHAH-NOO-KAH.

 

No matter^, the holiday of lights in the dark is coming this Gregorian calendar year-- starting December 7^th.

 

Lighting the darkness is not a simple thing. To me, darkness isn’t just the places where justice is scarce. It’s the very notion that we don’t know. It’s the future, the purpose of all, the ways of the creator.

 

It’s harder to be prideful and a know-it-all in the face of darkness.

 

And so, I light. One little candle, and counting, at a time.

At least for me, it’s more a hopeful gesture to understanding than a grand celebration.