StoryWorth HAS BEEN WORTH IT

 

A little over a year ago, DD informed me that a gift from her was coming my way via the interwebs.

And, as it turned out, the gift was a program that prompted me to write a post every week and upload it to a website that would, at the end of a full year, make a hardcover book with all I have contributed.

The prompts were chosen by DD. Examples of such would be, “Who were your friends in high school?” and “Favorite memory from early childhood.”

 

I received this gift with joy and dread. Here’s an abbreviated list of why:

1.      My daughter is interested in my life 🤗

2.      My daughter will be reading what I have to say now and in years to come 😊

3.      Does she think I need to be prompted to keep the writing gears going? 😕

4.      In addition to stories, I already write a weekly blog. Now I have an additional weekly assignment 😓

 

A year later, I can report that these prompts have been a delight, not a burden at all. Now that the book is done, I will miss it. StoryWorth is the name of this program, but there are others like it, and from my personal point of view it has been worth my while.

 

I will add a caveat to be aware of. I have no confidence that this operation (or others like it) is free of data mining. Even as they promise to guard your text from such (it isn’t publicly visible or published) the vehicle is the company’s files. Even if they do not share, there is no guarantee they won’t sell their application to another company in the future, and that company would pay them a good sum not for the paltry fee the users pay, but for the wealth of private data they would have access to. Some sites still use details in their security questions that one should never put out on the ether, ever. These “security” access questions are thankfully giving way to better ways, such as pins or keys in one’s possession only. But still, think of this when you use any of these services.

Mindful of that, I typed not a single detail/name/date that isn’t already easily available to the data miners. I was still able to put out my thoughts and real-life stories for fifty-two weeks.

CUT THE HARSH TALK TO SELF

 

The other day, I stopped, listened, and for the first time really heard— the harsh way I was talking to myself.

 

Me: “What a dumb thing to do, you!”

Self: “Really stupid. Don’t do that again.”

Me: “Only an idiot like you could do this.”

Self: “A moron. That’s what you are.”

 

What occurred to me right then was that what I should not do again was talk to self this way.

 

Old habits die hard. New habits, such as paying attention to self-flagellation, take time and resolve to stick and stay. So, the first order of business was to pay attention and Not. Do. This.

 

There’s an extra bonus to my new resolve. I find the harsh observations of others have softened and rounded also.

 

Kindness is contagious. Start with you.

DO SOMETHING TODAY YOUR TOMORROW WILL THANK YOU FOR

 

^GOOD ADVICE TO LIVE BY^

During my less self-scheduled days, I find myself tempted by a sense of laziness to put off what I could do but don’t have to.

 

“I can always do it tomorrow or the next day.”

“Who says I should? No one will notice either way.”

“It makes no difference to anyone.”

“I don’t feel like it.”

“I really don’t feel like it.”

 

All the above are dialogues with self.

 

This is what I have discovered over the last years: I am happier having done rather than not done. At the end of the day, and also the next day, this reward is worth more than I previously realized. At the end of the week, or the month, or the year, there’s a more contented me for having done what needed to be done as soon as I could instead of as late as I could.

 

Just a pep-talk to self here, which you are welcome to borrow. 😉

MANAGING DIFFERENCES as a GOAL, FOR LIFE and in STORIES

 

One of my foundational values is getting along with people.

It’s not much of an obstacle when others think like me. It’s only a challenge when we have differences. The deeper these are, the steeper the mountain to climb.

But that’s when it matters most.

 

Living as individuals in society presents this challenge every moment, unless you have made a point to wall off all but the most simpatico folks. I wasn’t raised to do that because, to both my parents, interacting only with the like-minded makes for a dull life.

 

I find that it takes three main values to live fully and remain close to people who think differently. First, one needs to be flexible. Second, one needs to be curious about possibilities that hadn’t already occurred, and third (perhaps the most important) one needs to practice genuine humility.

All will amount to a commitment to be happy, not “right.”

 

There is a tendency in literature, most obvious in literature for young readers, to not only present conflict between differing points of view but also to end by settling them with one side showing what is ultimately “right.” 

Today, we are told not to be preachy. But we must choose sides in more subtle ways.

The problem is that it doesn’t illuminate how to navigate differences, unless the stories are about acceptance. Acceptance of one’s personal situation, of one’s environment, and of what may come. This begins with self-acceptance, and these are the stories I strive to write.

It’s not “a win,” but it’s about the triumph of seeing conflict as something not to win, but to diffuse.

NO to “CHOSEN ONE” Stories

 

There’s a popular trope in children’s literature which swept the world with the arrival of Harry Potter et al. This trope centers on a child destined to save the world from evil.

 

One way or another, this superhero discovers their superpowers and, first resisting, disbelieving, trying to fit in, eventually the child accepts their destiny as the chosen one.

Then, we’re off to the races. The kid succeeds only to lose momentum, be plagued with doubts, find courage, and move forward to a triumphant victory.

 

If this sounds messianic, it’s because this trope follows that trajectory to a tee. For secular folks, this is either absurd or amusing enough. For believers in sacred scriptures, it’s both familiar and obscene in its conversion to Kidlit tales. I’m of the latter group, and reserve savior stories to the land of spiritual metaphor and the realm of the mysteries.

 

Even as a child I disliked these stories because once I laid the book down, I knew full well the world hadn’t been saved from evil. It never gave me messianic notions that I, too, could be a savior. I also had an instinctive recoiling from people I met who seemed to think they were such chosen ones.

 

In the stories I write and the stories I love reading, children (or adults) find a way to accept the ways of the world while vowing to do their best to make a small contribution to bettering it. These sorts of triumphs not only feel real, but they are inspiring because they are doable.

 

To quote, again, my late father: “Things being what they are, we should try to make them what they should be.” My father thought this was an example of a platitude, but the older I get the more it seems spot-on.