You’ve been warned. Right now, I’m Ms. Grump because of my yesterday.
I hope to climb out from under today with the help of letting it out here. 😠
If you’ve used health services for routine matters, you know
the drill. You called to make an appointment, navigated through the automatic
phone tree (“For providers press one, for appointments press two,” etc.) and
landed an actual person who makes the appointment.
Okay. Pat on the back. Done.
Not so, dear heart. ❤️
Two weeks before the scheduled appointment, the real
thrilling drill begins. You get a text/email instructing you to fill out a questionnaire
regarding your health status and more. This is a pre-registration promising to
save you time on the actual day. The link is to your online portal. You fill it
out. It only takes ten minutes.
Okay. Pat on the back. Done.
Not really. It just begun. 😮
The beginning of the week of the scheduled appointment (routine
screening, mind you) you get a text asking to confirm your appointment. It
says to reply with Y2 if confirmed, or N2 if not. You reply with a Y2.
Okay, this time we’re done. Right?
An immediate reply follows saying you failed to reply
properly and to call a certain number.
Only the number is missing two digits. But it’s what they
tell you to do. You look carefully and, yes, you replied with a Y2. Never mind,
call this non-number anyway.
Your phone tells you this is not a number. 🫢
You login through the portal and chat with a supposed real
person (Hi, Sam K.) who tells you to call a different number. At least this
number has all its digits.
You call the number Sam K. says to call and find yourself
climbing another automated phone tree and press option #3, for appointments.
You wait eighteen minutes to get a real person (Hi Trish) and are told she can’t
help with confirmations of already scheduled appointments. But Trish is nice
and will now transfer you to the number where they can do the deed.
But if you think we’re done here, you are too trusting.
The number Trish transferred to is, mercifully, not a phone
tree. The man who answers (Hi Jim) says he can’t help, but he will give you the
number that will.
That number puts you in a queue that lasts only seven minutes,
where Marla will now help you. Marla apologizes not for the madness of the
system, but for the sorrow you are experiencing, which, all things considered, Marla
understands and sympathizes. Bless Marla, she confirms your appointment for the end of this week.
And now you’re done. You sure hope so. You’ll know for sure at the end of the week if all goes smoothly when you arrive.
I hope you didn’t go through this. It sounds like a fictional
story. But I did, only yesterday. 😥
Here’s a simple suggestion: what if, while making the
appointment for this non-urgent routine screening test, the nice person who
schedules it (sorry, I didn’t write her name down) also fills the registration?
And what if a simple email to confirm is sent a week before where you speak
English to reply with a YES, I WILL BE THERE. How about them apples? 🍎🍏🍎
But that might be too simple, efficient and easy. Why make
it easy when it can be hard?
Rant over. Peace. 🤞🏻
6 comments:
Yes, it’s become a crazy system that we all endure because the old days of simply calling, talking to a human being, and making an appointment are gone, sadly. More automation, fewer people to hire and pay.
As someone who has lots of health issues and therefore lots of medical appointments, I sympathize with you totally. You're right--it's frustrating.
It's because of this and other nonsense that I've opted out of all this. I see a functional med. Dr. and soon I will not have to see him either. I know many physicians are not happy with this system either so they are developing the more old-fashioned way of dealing directly with the patient, even making house calls. Not involving insurance either.
M, son of a doctor, likes to joke that doctors like to wait for symptoms to develop further...
As you guessed, my poem on my blog was a similar way to release some of my frustration at my healthcare-related early phone call.
This is how life works now. It's horrible.
I have been there too. Now I no longer get excited about a text. It's mostly like from a provider asking to confirm. Loved your comic at the end!
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