You’ve heard the question, no
doubt. If you could tell your younger self anything,
what would it be?
Process isn't just the thing. It’s everything.
I find it more relevant to tell my young’uns
(the ones who are in my life and occasionally want to know what I think) that they are already
living “the life.” This is it. Destination is the illusion. You never get
there, unless by “there” you mean death, which we all get to.
It sounds grim but it isn’t. Goals are just a way to
go, not a destination. This means there is no reality to the elation of
reaching or deflation not achieving a goal, because we live on the road.
I know this feels counter intuitive to many who
are raised to think of concrete goals.
Put another way, using the metaphor of a
marathon for any goal— if I dream of becoming a marathon runner, the very act
of training is the experience, the real
thing. I will eventually run a marathon or not. Then the act of running is the thing. If I complete the marathon,
that is the thing. If I don’t, I’m
having that experience of something not completed, and it is the thing. In the rare event that I win
the marathon, I’m experiencing that, and it’s the thing.
No matter what, I’m living the life. Younger
self: this is it. The thing.
7 comments:
So true! This is why it's important to live in the moment.
Always a good lesson to try and remember to be in the moment...something I personally struggle with.
Good reminder.
So true. Rainer Maria Rilke said it best in his Letters to a Young Poet: "Try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don't search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the question now."
Well said. If I could tell my younger self something, it would be Rely On Your Self.
Love,
Janie
In some ways, this could refer back to the question you brought up in last week's post. A friend asked you, in different words, whether you enjoy the process of writing. Anyone engaged in creative work knows that the process is the experience; the book, the painting, the sculpture--whatever--is the product. You can't have a product without going through the moment-by-moment process of creating it, whether it's reaching the end of a marathon or weaving a tapestry.
Goals are about imagining a possible future; process is about being in your life in the present. When we're not present with what is, right now, we actually miss the life we're living.
Profound and true. Good to teach your daughter early.
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