Mother’s Day got me thinking about
the mother I had, as opposed to the mother I wished I had. It got me thinking
about both my parents, and a childhood I often wished I could re-write or
revise like a story.
From my childhood in Jerusalem I
remember Sabbath/Saturday mornings at my secular parents’ home as the day they
slept late. When my mother got up she made “French toast,” back then a real
oddity in Israel. Then my parents would put an opera on the turn-table, sit
with the libretto, and with only a small break for lunch, get through all four
or five LPs.
I sometimes followed the story and music with
them. My father would act it out and make it more vivid. Other times I would
stare out the window, and see other families going to and returning from
synagogue.
Since I didn’t go to synagogue until I was
much older, (and snuck by myself) those early images of families going to and
returning from were a source of longing for the “normal” family I didn’t have. What
happened in synagogue was shrouded in mystery for me.
Years later my best friend, whose
parents did go to synagogue, told me that she envied me my intellectual and
unconventional parents.
I think the longing “for something” is
universal, and so it manifests as wishing for what you don’t have.
The grass may be another color, not
just greener. Any color but your own.
This Mothers' day I awoke to a new
resolve to appreciate, if only for moments a day, the grass just as it grows
where I am.
10 comments:
Good advice for us all.... :)
Good food for thought...personally I'd love to find some orange grass to roll around in. I don't know why...it just sounds like it would be fun.
I enjoyed reading this memory. Yes, there is always a longing, isn't there?
That is such a lovely memory. My grandfather grew up in Jerusalem. I went there as a child but the place he grew up was bombed. But I know he had many great memories there. Happy Mother's Day!
If we are playing colors, I pick turquoise...
Jerusalem is always being rebuilt.
Very true! And that picture with the cows is priceless. :)
Great post. I love your final sentence. Things can change on us so quickly, and we look back and wish we had appreciated what we had. I like the way you put it "if only for moments a day." Because that's really all it takes, isn't it, for us to realize how much we have to be grateful for. Then those few moments can change our attitude for the whole day.
I love your post, Mirka. Thank you for reminding me to be aware and appreciate the good things I have. I'm sending hugs to the little girl in you who was longing for something different.
Longing for something can sometimes be good, of course, if it provides the motivation to change something for the better. But that's where the prayer--"Lord, help me to change the things I can, to accept the things I can't, and to have the wisdom to know the difference"--is important.
You're right -- the longing for something is universal, and by definition, we long for what we don't have.
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