*...off the cliff, while hanging on
by the fingernails
This blog post appeared a few months back, but I find it one
to bookmark and return to.
The gist of it is that feedback on one’s work, while
essential and helpful, is not to be treated as sacred and infallible. I would say it even more strongly: it is,
like we all are, biased and fallible.
What is left for creatives is to discern what helps them,
and what is unhelpful or worse, i.e. toxic.
This is just as hard a process as the initial making
something out of nothing, be it writing, painting, or composing. Just as hard,
and much less enjoyable.
But discernment on how to use feedback is indispensable.
Early on, I took every single point to heart. Then I learned
what worked for me. Here is the way I go about this stage—
A. Feedback
received, read, and with tears blurring my eyes I type a Thank You note. I’m
grateful for the time and thought they gave. This is not a fully digested
reaction to the content.
B. Letting
the feedback rest for a time.
C. Marking
the points that make perfect sense with an exclamation. This part is actually
enjoyable, not only because every fix is a clear improvement. What makes sense
also makes me feel this reader understood my work. Then I make the suggested
changes one by one. By now I feel I’m working, and things are looking up.
D. Mark
the points that maybe possibly sort of make sense to me with a question mark,
to be addressed later.
E. Mark
the points that seem completely off with a red dot. I will return to them only
after I digested all the rest, and have gotten more feedback from another beta
reader.
F. Keep
the feedback as a printed or word file, because someday it will either resonate
fully or be the funniest thing I ever read. But when fresh it’s not funny.
I go through more or less all the above with all feedback. I
continue to seek it. I do my best to give helpful feedback. It’s part of the
writing life, and in a way, part of life, period.
You have a good approach.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Janie
Thanks, Janie. Any approach that benefits the work and doesn't diminish the worker is a good one.
DeleteYou have an excellent attitude and what sounds like a very workable approach. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteFrom my No.#1 Beta! I never worry about toxicity with you.
DeleteGreat post. I'm in a really large critique group at the moment and it's interesting how often half of the readers will delete the same sentence others say they love.
ReplyDeleteOh, tell me about it. It's particularly noticeable when editors' feedback collide.
DeleteSo true. Feedback can be exciting because you can see that it's helping you figure out what you couldn't, or debilitating. It's good to learn this. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteThe point to remember is that you are the author. Same for giving feedback-- Then, the writing isn't yours and you are just one reader wanting to help.
DeleteThe first few times as a newbie, I cried. I have come to accept all feedback as reactions and opinions my varied readers might also have. It helps me to focus on the particular readers I am trying to reach. Sometimes I am just plain stubborn and tell myself, "Too bad. I like it and I am going with this!"
ReplyDeleteTrine
Very natural and understandable first reaction. That's where I find that letting it sit a while is constructive.
DeleteYeah, it took me a long time to develop thick skin about critiques. Most people mean well, even when their remarks are way off the mark because they don't understand the genre.
ReplyDeleteI'm so grateful for my critique group, which I trust completely.
You hit the nail on the head, Barbara. *Trust* is a very important part of successful use of feedback.
DeleteGiving feedback time to settle in your mind is definitely key. Not all feedback is worth taking, but sometimes something that seemed crazy at first winds up making a lot of sense after I've given myself time to think it over.
ReplyDeleteSo true, Kelly. I have gone back to points I had marked with a red dot (as "no!") and made changes based on them many months after I got them. They "settled" and then made good sense.
DeleteBut not always, and not all.